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Alastor was an ace of spades who had no fleshly desires at all — or so he thought. Then Lucifer Morningstar came along, and he felt things he’d never felt before. Lust. Fear. Desire. He felt threatened, and what better way to deal with a threat than to take control of that which was threatening, by any means necessary? Lucifer just wanted to be a good father to his daughter, Charlie. He never expected to be drugged to the point of weakness by one of her so-called “friends” and he certainly didn’t expect to become a victim of something as horrible and cruel as rape. What makes it worse is that the rape forces him to remember that his body is hermaphroditic in the worst way possible. Charlie just wants to reconnect with her father. But suddenly, he seems so small, so scared. Like a porcelain doll that will break if she so much as looks at him the wrong way. She doesn’t know what’s wrong — but she knows something IS wrong, and she wants, so badly, to help him. But how can she help him when he refuses to speak about it? And why is Alastor so much more coy and buddy-buddy than usual, too? Somehow, she thinks it’s connected to her father’s sudden meek temperament, and she doesn’t like it one bit.

Many sinners will tell you just how frightening the King of Hell truly is. From the way he holds himself up in battle to the way he loves his daughter and wife. That's what the public said, anyway. He had to make Charlie happy. He had to, there was no other way about it. She was in fact his everything. He couldn't risk losing her again. Even if risking revealing the worst parts of himself to an unexpected, annoying, self-centered, certain Overlord.

It’d been a long time since Lucifer shared a bed with someone. Technically, he didn’t even need to sleep and neither did any other sinner demons here. It was the lingering dregs of their humanity that made them think they did and most of them never bothered to give it up and why not? They had all of eternity to work on it and anyway, what else did they have to do?

Lucifer’s tongue caught the razor-sharp tip of Alastor’s tooth and golden blood spilled. Instead of wiping it away, Lucifer stared directly into Alastor’s eyes and leaned back in to lick the taste of his angelic blood into Alastor’s mouth. Sequel to "Guilty Pleasures" but can be read as a stand alone fic.

The battle is over, the hotel is being rebuilt, and everything is coming up roses, as much as anything can grow in Hell. There's just one thing that's taking up entirely too much of Lucifer's thoughts. One thing or one person, and it's one hell of a distraction, no pun intended. Lucifer was supposed to be working on rebuilding and Alastor was supposed to be sleeping. So far, neither of them are doing what they should be, no surprise, there, was it? Neither of them have ever been very good at doing what they've been told. (spoilers for finale)

Prompt made by turtleofthehallow on tumblr! “ I need someone to write fanfiction of Lucifer and Alastor making a deal, but Luci botches the wording of the deal so bad that they end up married instead, and neither of them know how to break the deal, so they're just stuck like this until further notice “ -- Alastor And Lucifer Tried to make a deal, a deal where Alastor Stays Away from the kings daughter, but Lucifer being the Clumsy Man he is, botched up the agreement. Now Alastor and Lucifer are Officially married and there's havoc everywhere Lucifer Doesnt know how to deal With. Being Alastor, he torments the man to a point that makes him burst how will they deal with this Accedential Consort ?