satire

Hermione has a problem after the disastrous outcome of her ingestion of the polyjuice potion during second year. The results of the potion are irreversible. How will her two best friends react when they find out that she is likely to remain half-cat for the rest of her life? ------------------------------- Seeing as HPfanficarchive is shutting down due to the death of the owner, I'm going to maintain my bragging rights by mentioning that this story has been one of the only two Number One Blue Ribbon stories at HPfanfacarchive for well over five years. (The other one being The Curious Case of Luna Lovegood by Marvolo666)

“Heil Hydra,” the enemy agent shouts. “Heil this, motherfucker,” says Captain America, shooting off a rocket. Steve and Bucky find out Hollywood has been busy since they went away. A historical survey, including but not limited to: one set of exploded genitals, a brief interlude in France, Mel Gibson and other masterworks of casting, eight Academy awards, several dinosaurs, and something Tony Stark has ominously dubbed “the masterpiece.” Art included.

Your marriage to Gojo Satoru lost its initial excitement, since your husband spent all his time either at Jujutsu Tech or on exorcism missions across the world. To ease your loneliness, you picked up your favorite pastime from your student years — clubbing — behind his back. Too bad that on Satoru’s most recent mission he spots his wife dancing in a nightclub with a bunch of guys in the skimpiest dress he has ever seen on her…

Ted was just having fun on Halloween. He had a pretty clever costume and an invite to a pretty fun party, and was making the best of it-- when he suddenly gets yanked sideways through reality into Equestria. Naturally he manages to make a very bad first impression, and is now an enemy of the State... Maybe he shouldn't have gone out dressed as a villain.

u/McMrChillGuy492 NTA. Why is everyone calling OP an asshole? Of course he's trying to get custody of his younger brother after getting out of foster care and back on his feet. When did that become controversial? u/BedwarsAlien That's not his brother u/McMrChillGuy492 What? u/BedwarsAlien Check his post history. Tommy's not his brother and he's not even in foster care. He's literally just a random kid u/McMrChillGuy492 What the fuck??????

Dumbledore gets his timing right for once... The Wizarding World is a darkfic Pornotopia. Innuendo or implied threat in the canon are exaggerated and pursued to logical conclusions, particularly when logic is lampshaded by the films. The dialogue leans on British TV character based comedy.

Hello fellow human! So you’ve gone and complicated your life with WEREWOLVES! Whether by accident or intentional, your life has now changed irrevocably. But relax. I’m here to help you. As a fragile member of Homo sapiens who has spent years running with a pack (to the point that I am married to a werewolf) I have taken the liberty of explaining some of the more important gestures, vocalizations, habits and other oddities that come part and parcel with your lycanthrope friends. Whether you’re dating one, living with one, related to one or have had one next door, my definitive guide to speaking wolf will have you interacting with your furry friends in no time at all! Is that howl angry, sad or plain wistful? No problem! Can’t tell the difference between a huff and a growl? Relax! Is that a nuzzle or a sniff? Be confused no more! Read on, and communicate with your lycanthropes as if you were one yourself!

The whirlwind of strife of wars past and present requires Jon and Sansa to wed (and consummate) in order to secure their new kingdom. With dragons to the South and Others to the North, they are surrounded by foes, and can only do what they can to keep things together. Which is all they want, right?

Six months ago, the popular space opera Lost Galaxy did the unthinkable: it made the controversial enemy-soldier ship MattKira canon. That would be bad enough on its own, but then anti blogger Rey finds a MattKira fanfiction reblogged onto her dashboard. Her solution? Start hate-reading it and posting a running commentary on just how bad it is. One problem. The fic is actually pretty good. And then the author, KyloRen, sends her a message...

Anything to do with Gojo Satoru can be needlessly complicated, and he's someone you really don't want to get involved with. Unfortunately for you, fate has other plans.

Car commercial for the 2025 Reinholt FullThrottle, which will fuck your kids silly...

A werewolf that hunts vampires, a young vampire abandoned by his Sire, and a mutual need for warmth.

What if Harry and Quirrell in "Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality" had the personalities of Rick and Morty from "Rick & Morty"? Updates after appropriate real-world events.

It just was just another day for Oikawa; getting up early to go to volleyball practice and tease Iwa-chan. But that changes when he sees the note taped to his window. What did it say? YOU SHOULD HAVE COME TO SHIRATORIZAWAFROM, YOUR BFF @ SHIRATORIZAWA

Basically just a bunch of drabbles within the fandoms I follow between the length of really short paragraphs to small one-shots because sometimes I don't know when to stop writing. If you want me to write about specific characters/scenarios/fandoms or have a prompt for me, drop a comment my way and I'll be glad to write it for you. x *each chapter will have letters in capitals at the end to establish which fandom it belongs to, i.e Chicago Fire-CF, Harry Potter-HP, Jaspar-J, Phandom-PH, Avengers-AVI'll add more as I add more fandoms to this work.

In a life without Bella Swan, the only boundary between two clans is Jacob Black--heir to the Alpha title even though he cannot take the form of a wolf. What sort of fate lies to this boy, whose heart is slowly being drawn to the least likely Pale One of all? Does this path to Emmett hold some light for the future, or, are they all just fucked?

One day, for a dare, I went into a forest. Alone. I guess they are trying to scare me in some way. I'm not scared easily. Then, I heard a crack of a twig. I whipped my head around. There was no one there. Then another one. Then, I got jumped. Though, the person was pretty weak. I punched them, and then the shadow fell backward with a groan. I quickly got up and started yelling, I assumed it was one of my friends who were pranking me. Then I realized. This wasn't my friend.___________ Or some cringe ass satire fic that started as a joke with some online friends but here i am posting it on AO3. Will add tags as this continues on.

In 2185, the inhabitants of the Milky Way discovered garden worlds in the Andromeda Galaxy. A group of pioneers was sent to settle it, calling the project the Andromeda Initiative. After the 600 year journey in cryo sleep, the colonists awaken in Andromeda only to find the worlds destroyed, their way back blocked and their entire fleet drawn into a war where they must depend on an untested, young Pathfinder to survive. As they struggle to make a home in the now hostile galaxy, mysteries start to appear. What is the true nature of the Remnants? What truly are the natives? What is the true purpose of the war- And why…do their leaders keep dying?

Davos Seaworth has the least enjoyable job in the United States of Westeros He must manage the presidential campaign of Stannis Baratheon, Governor of Dragonstone and the least popular politician in the country. In order to do so, he must deal with Secretary of the Treasury Petyr Baelish, the twin Senators Cersei and Jaime Lannister, the megachurch preacher Melisandre Asshai, and Robb Stark, the vengeful new Representative from Winterfell. On top of that, Joffrey Baratheon just promised to build a wall in the North and make the wildlings pay for it. If there’s one thing Davos knows, it’s this: Election Day is coming. [American Politics! AU]

basically a bunch a puns... and comedy-ish? I guess... what do you do with a horrible writer with an awful sense of humor?you barium.