weasel

There’s a weird familiarity about the kid's tone and posture, and it’s true that Wade is pretty far from home today but he’s also certain he’d remember that baby-face if he’d seen it before. On the other hand, he has spent the better part of the past few years feeling like he’s missed a step, so this conversation isn’t exactly anything new.[[A hot guy is willingly talking to us. Go with it.]][Don’t make an ass of yourself.]“Shaddup,” Wade grumbles, though Yellow has a point...OR Peter thinks Wade knows his secret identity, and Wade is really confused by the hot coed who keeps popping up and hanging out with him.

In Peter’s professional opinion, the world had gone to shit. When Tony had snapped, bringing back half of all life and stopping Thanos, everyone thought that the world would go back to the way it was. But nothing ever works out so nicely, does it? ———— When Peter is given the chance to go back and save everyone, he is sent back to before Civil War. All alone, Peter must find a way to save the avengers, and the world. Shit.

(FIC HAS BEEN FULLY REVISED AND EDITED TO THIRD-PERSON POV! REVISED AS OF 6/30/21! WOO!) Wherein Deadpool is reluctantly hired to protect Peter Parker from an organization out to hunt him, with varying success on both ends and quite a lot of feelings, revelations, and identity crises.

Weapon X chose Wade Wilson because of several factors in his life. He was a preternatural. He had extraordinary abilities that could be expanded upon. The cancer just made him desperate enough to agree to whatever they wanted to do with him. They didn't just turn him immortal. They destroyed his very soul, tearing him apart and shaping him into something new and never seen before. They took everything he had been and left him with ashes and bones. Soulless. He killed his creators and went on with his life. Then he met Spider-Man. Things started to change. Something inside him, something that had come out of the ashes and was a nightmarish, terrible thing, sat up and took notice. An intense, single-minded notice.

Basically a rewrite of the first Deadpool movie mixed with The Amazing Spider-Man movies (AKA what if they were the love interest in each other’s movies). What if Wade had changed his plan and Peter had been the one delivering pizza to Jeremy the stalker.

The first time they met, Peter had been fifteen and Deadpool had seemed like a weird enigma to him.The next time they met, Peter had blipped and Deadpool hadn't. Time, having passed in unequal amounts for two very different people, had fundamentally changed their lives and the people they were. They hadn't even ever known one another before, and now that was about to change... ————————————————————— "You're too young to be frowning so much." Deadpool said with a sigh, and Peter went cross-eyed briefly when Deadpool tapped at the crease between his eyebrows. "I'm not young." Peter blurted, and then tried to clarify, "I am young, I guess, but not…I mean…I was younger, you know, like too young, when we first met…but n-not…not anymore-…" "Not too young, anymore, huh." Deadpool repeated and Peter stopped rambling, meeting Deadpool's mask's eyes, "Not too young for what exactly?" the older man asked in a tone of voice that was all at once amused and very, very suggestive.

Peter has enough problems with high school, friendship complications, an internship at Oscorp, and his arachnid alter ego. Throw in a merc with a mouth covered in unfairly sexy red leather, and things get a little crazy. Wade just wants to talk shit with his friend Weasel, eat tacos, listen to bad tween pop music, and participate in some soft-core torture and murder. When a certain little spider swings into his life, things get complicated. Spider-Man saves people. Deadpool kills them. An unlikely friendship (and maybe more) forms, but will it still work when the masks come off? Translated into: Italiano, русский, Español

It has been a year since the Battle of New York, but while the city is recovering, mysterious sleepwalkers have been seen roaming the streets. Spider-man feels something is wrong but he seems to be the only one worried. His troubles only increase when Deadpool comes looking for some help. Their investigation takes them further than they expect, forcing them to face their own pasts. But will the bond forming between them help or hurt? [Set in the early MCU with comics-inspired Spider-Man and Deadpool]

After serving his 20 years in the Marine Corps, Wade Wilson is cashing in his GI Bill and going back to college. He feels like the old man on campus, but that doesn't matter. He likes his classes. He likes learning. And he especially likes his Chemistry professor with the messy brown hair. (COMPLETE!!) [(Tags updated. Trigger Warnings are on all chapters containing sensitive content.)]

After an emotional break up with Alpha!Harry, Omega!Peter is determined to find his own way in the world.A heat that comes on too quickly lands him at Weasel's bar, the domain of one very Alpha Wade Wilson, who takes one look at Peter and knows they they are meant to be mates.Wade doesn't think Peter wants to be matched with an Alpha at all, much less an Alpha that looks like him, so he keeps things platonic, ignoring his feelings so Peter feels safe.Peter wants more from the Alpha than just a text messages and hilarious-but-inappropriate jokes and over drinks one night, he asks Wade to share his next heat.Was finding real love as easy as a chance meeting at a crappy bar? ~~~“He wants me to hold him.” Wade folded his arms and ducked his chin. “I don’t know how to do that.” "I can google it for you?” Weasel shrugged. “But you just sorta put your arms around him and squeeze. Kindergarten stuff, right?” The Alpha scowled. "I want to hold him, I just can’t.” “Oh you mean because of the old avocado hate f*cking another avocado thing?” Weasel pointed to Wades face. “Don’t sweat it, I hear millennials love avocados. He should be fine.” "You're the worst."

Peter’s headache is only growing worse. He has no idea where he is, no recollection of the past 24 hours, and is stuck inside a small, cramped space with Deadpool. And, apparently, a slumped, unconscious lump of a man. What the heckaroonie.

彼得認為他的靈魂伴侶大概在第十三天就意識到他還在念高中。或者，一個你和你的靈魂伴侶共同承受彼此痛苦，而韋德付出遠多於獲得的故事。

When Peter’s aunt dies, he ends up in the custody of his mother’s brother. A man who he didn’t even realize existed until a few minutes before meeting him. Obviously there must be a reason for that, right? Aunt May and Uncle Ben wouldn’t have hidden another half of his family from him without one or two… But it turns out there were a whole lot of reasons. Each one worse than the one before. Seems like his Parker luck is catching up with him. But maybe some good can come from this in the long run? After all, what his new uncle doesn’t know won’t kill him. But it will probably bite Spider-Man in the ass if he isn’t careful.

Peter meets Deadpool when he’s in his civvies, and has the good fortune of remaining unrecognized. But with a friend like Deadpool — and his interesting habit of trying to feed his good buddy Spider-Man — he finds it hard to be too worried. When Deadpool winds up coincidentally finding Peter a second and third time, the merc gets attached to the cute brunet. Meanwhile, Spider-Man and Deadpool are a crime fighting duo tackling strange activity on the docks with suspicious ties to an all too familiar organization. A fluffy, angsty, eventually smutty Spideypool romp with an identity reveal endgame and regular updates on Mondays and Fridays. Rating and tags reflect entire fic. Smut starts at chapter 9.

Peter Parker finally returns home after being on the run for almost a year. He's excited to live in the Avengers compound with his family and heroes, but everyone knows that it's not easy to adjust to a life in the public eye. Peter may think all is well and great, but his guardians know otherwise. Especially when a person from Peter's parents' past makes a return that certainly promises danger to the young hero. From the perspectives of Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Happy Hogan, Shuri and others!

The world is horrible. Betas rule, alphas are treated like dumb brutes, and omegas... omegas are traded and sold, used and chained, treated like slaves. Deadpool can't possibly kill the entire world, and he can't kill himself to escape it, so he's stuck trying the best he can to tolerate existing. He saves omegas when he can, kills betas when he can, and lives an otherwise empty existence hiding away in his apartment. Peter grew up hidden away from the world, an omega not trained to submit. When he's finally found out and sold off, he thinks his life is over. And for a long time, it is. Years later, he's left abandoned in an alley, near dead and wishing for it, when along comes an alpha... All the hurt, all the comfort, please heed the tags and warnings.

Wade Winston Wilson is ugly. His skin's inside out. It ripples and moves every second of every day, at constant war with the cancer. Vanessa put on a brave face for him when she first saw the changes, but it turns out even she can't stomach the sight for long. He's ugly and alone and nothing will ever be good in life again - If only that were his only problem. But Weapon X is at it again, under crisp new management, turning orphans into super slaves and bringing out the big guns to make sure nobody interferes this go around (namely one Pool comma Dead). So now, not only is Wade alone and ugly forever, but he's got a bit of a pest problem in the form of a black-clad murder-happy man spider with a collar around his neck and an unhealthy obsession with tying Deadpool up. So maybe it's not all bad...

One night, Deadpool sees Spider-Man's face and then kisses him, sparking something unbreakable between them. Meanwhile, Peter Parker meets Wade Wilson on Tinder, unaware of the fact that he already knows Wade very intimately indeed.

Peter Parker. Broke college student, and neighborhood hero. Unfortunately, being Spider-Man isn't his only side job anymore.When Deadpool took up a job to take out Peter Parker, out of boredom from Spider-man being gone, he discovered the boy's struggle for money. Making it his mission to improve the boy's circumstances. While Peter grows fond of Wade, he feels there's still something missing. So what happens when Deadpool looks out for Peter, and Spider-man starts seeing Deadpool in a whole new light?It's the broke college kid sucks **** for money when the guy hired to kill him starts being his sugar daddy fic trope.This fic will range between silly, serious, and smutty.

Just when Wade is ready to blow his brains out to escape boredom, Weasel calls with a new mission related to Peter Parker. Little does he know that not only is Peter his masked idol, he already met him.So what does he do when finds himself too attached to his mission? He's Deadpool... odds are it will be bloody.

Deadpool is hired by Harry Osborn to retrieve Peter Parker. But what seems like a simple job of rounding up an average college student is complicated by the fact the kid has insane luck at miraculously dodging Deadpool's attempts to kidnap him, and also, Spider-Man keeps showing up. Add to the fact that Osborn wasn't as clear about his intentions, and Deadpool starts to wonder if he should be going after Parker, or protecting him.

When Peter Parker reveals his identity to Deadpool, both men struggle to work around this new dynamic. It doesn't help that the Tin Man known as Iron Man is sticking his nose in where it doesn't belong, thank you very much. Slow burn, eventual smut, chivalry, manly tears, and a little bit of hot sauce.

.oOo. Bucky Barnes has had 5 pregnancy scares in his life. 3 of which, the girls were actually pregnant. 1 of which had an abortion before he could ever have a chance to think about it. 2 of which, the kids were not his (yeah, he sure knows how to pick em') in which 1, he didn't find out till the kid was actually almost a year old (bitch) which made him more suspicious about the last one, but at least she was honest (they weren't committed, pretty open relationship). 6 in total, if you count the time he was worried about his sister Becca because of the prick she was dating then. None of which he might be the one who was pregnant. .oOo.

“Deadpool. He’s an insane, ruthless mercenary who doesn’t care about anything other than money. He travels wherever his contracts are, and he will kill anyone and do anything to get the job done.”Peter almost wants to laugh and comment, since Tony has a lot of moments where he’s only cared about money, but he’s too preoccupied learning about a killer in his city. A killer for hire that he wasn’t aware of. Until now. - - - - - In which Peter Parker learns the truth about Wade Wilson after the Avengers make him believe the man is a ruthless killer. Turns out they're pretty compatible, but the Avengers don't give a shit about chemistry.

Wade is gone and Peter is broken. Deadpool is killing again and Spider-Man is… Different. They’ve fallen out of sync, and it seems like attempting the impossible to try clawing their way back to how it was before. If they find a way back to each other, will the pieces still fit? Or will the trust between them be too broken to mend? *** Sequel to I Think I Might've Inhaled You.